What a strange fortnight.
You’ll notice I didn’t blog- I was caught in some strange kind of funk where I was miserable, anxious and words just would not flow. The guilt of not blogging compounded things. Now, note I blog as a therapeutic kind of catharsis. I write as therapy, to record insights, work through issues. So honestly, blogging was probably just what I needed to work through it. But que sera!
I am embarrassed to admit this, but after a visit with Dr Google, I had decided I was sick, not well at all. Probably burnt out adrenals, and an underactive thryroid. This was compounding my sleeplessness, anxiety etc. One magic pill was probably all I would need, I would magically sleep and return to my happy self.
I was so convinced I was sick, I got miserable, depressed and even started to feel unwell. One visit to the doctor, 2 weeks of intense testing ( I did things that no person should have to do!) and an anxious wait later, I actually heard myself say “I’d better be sick after all of this.” A littled twisted, yes?
So, long story short, tests revealed not only was I fine, I was the picture of perfect health. Kidneys, adrennals, thyroid, blood, iron, vitamin- all picture perfect. Nothing. Wrong. At. All.
Well, don’t I feel foolish. All of that “Woe is me”. For naught.
Clearly, time to get over myself.
Well, Doctor (real one, not google!) what’s wrong with me? She just laughed. And then patiently explained that I’m just too busy and I worry too much. Oh.
So, here’s to a new direction in life. More fun, more stopping and slowing. More me time. More self-nuturing and focus on good mental health (because apparently my physical health is just fine.
Is there a pill for that?